The Battles of Being Home During COVID-19

May 11, 2020

Exodus 17:12

“When Moses’ arms grew heavy they took a stone and put it under him, and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up – one on one side, one on the other – – so that his hands remained steady till sunset.”

Weary moms. Precious mom warriors battling the daily activities of a Stay at Home order. Our homes have become a new kind of battle ground, one where we may have no means of reprieve while we are all stuck home together if we aren’t willing to make some choices for change in our thinking. 

How about you? Are your thoughts invading your peace?  Do you lack joy?  Are you so busy attending to kids, spouse, homework, house work, and your job, that you find yourself battle weary in what used to be a place of rest, quiet or comfort during the day? 

Well if so, I am right there with you fellow warrior. If life feels upside down right now and you’re at the end of yourself at the beginning of the day, I hear you. I see you mom.

Our space, where for at least several hours each day had some focused time to recharge ourselves before the kids get home from school and the busy evening begins. We moms love to take care of our tribe as busy and demanding as it can be, we enjoy it.

But take out the several hours a day that we could call ours, the time to dig into a study, read a book, have quiet time with God, do laundry and clean, go to the grocery store, all the things behind the scenes of our home, and we are thrust into a battle of new proportions. 

If you have littles, I feel for you. I grieve for your lost moments of quiet. This may be one of the hardest times in your life so far. We as moms are thrust into life with everyone being around all the time, and if you’re like me, even if I can go to another room and not be interrupted, there’s something in me that is always an alert knowing there are others in the house, others who I love dearly and cherish.

I feel a loss of freedom. Freedom to play music throughout the house and sing-along, the freedom to sit down and rest for a while without being judged. But is this true?  Am I not as free today as I was a few months ago? Or do I have a choice to make?

I can choose daily to live in the tension of my heart not feeling supported, or I can choose to allow myself the freedom in my own headspace. My perspective can shift. I am able to choose to relax my body, release the tension and adapt to my new reality with expectancy of new beginnings and shared moments of fun and spontaneity with my family being around all the time.

My posture can be seen as resentful or it can be seen as hopeful. I have the ability to choose what I give to others, and so do you weary mom, sweet beautiful weary mom. 

When I thought about how my family will remember the quarantine of 2020, my perspective shifted from a fearful rule follower to a hopeful memory maker. 

Our children are all in the same educational phase – – schools will adapt next year and catch them up. The pressure to educate them can be overwhelming, and the tension created can be foreboding.  I have released the pressure of the teacher mom – – I am not trained for that. What I am given task to is to take care of my family. For me, taking care brings thoughts of gentleness, playfulness, listening, comforting and delight. 

What does it stir in you? 

Could it be possible that our children no matter their age – – remember this as a time when we laughed and played together. When we didn’t yell when this thing was spilled or that thing was broken. When mom looked at us with compassion and saw our fears in the bad behavior and instead of scolding us she began holding us, rocking, and singing to us. 

Seeing their frightened heart, it looked a lot like her own. She sang the song she needed to hear, her frightened heart was no different. She needed soothing and reassuring too. This time could be quite a gift if we choose to accept it.

I choose to see it as a gift and a legacy to learn and show empathy to my family.  It allows me to offer grace in the moments I used to offer anger. 

It’s been said that mom sets the temperature of the home.  If this is true, I want to set the temperature at acceptance, forgiveness, empathy, kindness, delight, and comfort. 

We all have a choice to make. 

How are you affecting the temperature in your home today?

 I am rooting for you mom, to choose well and offer the comfort you need as well sweet warrior.